Small but Not Really is a new column hosted by AVE, where we will try to help address your dilemmas about living as Asians in Europe. What happens when racism is perpetuated by leaders who look like you and are dismissed by the very people you thought would understand it? In this second edition of AVE’s Small but Not Really column, an early-career researcher reflects on a painful encounter with a senior scholar of Asian descent, who claims to have never experienced Anti-Asian racism and would rather embrace the stereotypes rather than question its existence.. This account examines how internalized racism, power, and silence in academia, create the perfect storm for racism to remain unchallenged. It also shows the importance of  solidarity and  awareness of the influence and power that you have.